It's never the drug itself that triggers the rush you get, that's already inside you...But the drug stimulates an uncontrollable release of serotonin and endorphins, causing you to feel a surreal happiness you never thought possible. It's only when the drug wears off and all the doors slam shut that you remember what is to be alone, struggling to survive in a life so worthless...You don't see anything but darkness, even when you detach yourself from your body and become the spirit watching over it. You need to disconnect because it's the only way you can escape, from a reality that has nothing left for you anymore...My name is Robyn and I was raped when I was ten years old. This is the true story of my life-long battle with depression and how, after years of abuse and addiction, I finally found happiness in my search for better life...