For the first time the secret joke archives of the legendary comedian are opened up for all to enjoy. Relive the laughter with jokes on every subject from 'A for Absent-minded' to 'Z for Zoo'. Part of an ongoing series of books celebrating the Cooper legacy, Tommy Cooper's Secret Joke Files follows hot on the heels of John Fisher's bestselling The Tommy Cooper Joke Book and Tommy Cooper's Mirth, Magic and Mischief. It promises to be the funniest yet.
Alphabet
My little boy learnt the alphabet. I said, 'What comes after A?' He said,
'All the rest of them!'
Doctors
I said, 'Doctor, I keep getting these dizzy spells.' He said, 'Vertigo?' I said,
'No, I only live up the road!'
Facts of Life
When my wife was pregnant we went to see a baby doctor, but he didn't
know anything. He was only eight months old!
Horses
I used to have a riding school, but business kept falling off!
Waiters
I said to the waiter, 'There's no chicken in this chicken soup.' He said,
'And there's no horse in the horseradish either!'
Wives
The other night I had an argument with my wife in the launderette ...
but we went home and ironed things out!