It's the year 2011. The New Project Party is on a moral revival campaign and Selwyn Knox, the recently appointed minister for the Department for Society, is at its helm. Sonya Mair, his political adviser, is helping him call the shots - as well as helping him with some more personal matters . . . Together they've selected the team. Very carefully. In fact, they've got dossiers on every last member . . .

Sir Robert Nottridge, Permanent Secretary: Eton, Cambridge, married, no children - or so his wife thinks. Christopher Brody, director of policy: a helpless gambler with debts up to his eyeballs and two mortgages. Nigel Tonbridge, director of strategy and communications: ex-journo and keeper of some dark family secrets - as well as some disturbing political ones that might just taint Saint Selwyn . . . But for now, the team better do as they're told, and get down to administering morality.

Meanwhile, back at Downing Street, PM Andy Sheen is suffering a few smears of his own . . .