Ginsterpigs by Emmalena Ellis
Middle-aged and muddle-minded, up until now, Frank has survived a pedestrian existence. His interests in bus-spotting, people-watching, and guinea pig racing are known only to a select few. Living in the shadows of Dover, his town of Cocklescanslanky is a small and unremarkable blip on the map of the British Isles. Resigned to his existence, Frank has retained a solitary thrill that comes with attending the yearly Guinea Pig Games competitions - where he hopes he and his pet MOL will compete for victory and one of the coveted purple rosettes. But then 'love' happens. When taking a bus towards the town to buy a birthday present, Frank has the first of increasing encounters with a bold, brash, pink-haired extroverted artisan Toni, whose emergence is like a blanket of Technicolor and seeks to change his perception of life and love and everything in between. Frank is unsure where the nerve to ask her out came from but is far more confused by Toni agreeing to a date. But a complete novice in the world of dating, Frank's sense of self begins spiraling out of control. The ensuing whirlwind brings with it a potentially broken nose, tension and ethic filled gatherings, losing his virginity, a prospective promotion and the various ups and downs of the problems faced by his family and friends. Frank soon wonders if everything is a fever dream from a concussion or the first signs of madness. Perhaps he doesn't understand love after all.