When Will My Grown-Up Kid Grown Up? by Jeffery Jensen Arnett
Arnett, the world's leading authority on emerging adulthood - that stage of life between 18-29 when a child is not still a young adult nor yet quite a stand-alone adult - joins up with family/relationship writer Elizabeth Fishel for a book that will finally tell parents of 20-something children what's going on...and what they should be doing about it. Arnett's and Fishel's point-of-view is direct, honest, but up-beat; research shows that taking time between adolescence and adulthood to "launch, explore, and land" is a good thing, almost always resulting in happier, more successful adults. But they also realize that parents, whose own path to adulthood was often very different, need guidance: What happened to graduating from college in four years? When did the Bank of Mum and Dad open for? Business? You're looking for a new job...again? I'm fine with straight or gay, but I don't even know what "questioning" means. Did you just say you're moving back home? What about grandchildren? I want to stay in touch as much as the next person, but should we be texting 10 times a day? When is it time to worry? To sum up Arnett's and Fishel's advice: Parents need to move in a parallel plane with their kids, striking a delicate balance between stepping back and staying connected - always mindful of their own needs as they, too, move through the significant transitional stage of middle age and beyond.