Contents
Foreword by Richard J. Foster 9
Introduction: Beginnings 13
Understanding Submission 21
1. Submission: Submitting to the Will of Wind and Children 23
Understanding Fasting 35
2. Fasting: Hunger in Dark Rooms 37
Understanding Study 47
3. Study: Practicing My Failures 49
Interlude: Discipline Hazard #1: The Self-Hatred
Narrative 58
Understanding Solitude 67
4. Solitude: Souvenirs from the Void 69
Understanding Meditation 77
5. Meditation: Cooking Chemicals in My Head 79
Understanding Confession 91
6. Confession: My Redemption Tour 93
Understanding Simplicity 107
7. Simplicity: The Gift of Boredom 109
Understanding Service 119
8. Service: Can I Be Your Martyr? 121
Interlude: Discipline Hazard #2: My Inner
Pharisee 131
Understanding Prayer 139
9. Prayer: Gifts from Bill 141
Understanding Guidance 153
10. Guidance: Embracing the Desert 155
Understanding Worship 167
11. Worship: Responding to the Divine Spark 169
Understanding Celebration 179
12. Celebration: Tattooed Joy 181
Conclusion: Endings and New Beginnings 189
Further Reading 195
Acknowledgments 198
Notes 202